How to live as an actor in Hollywood while working in the dot-com world (the David Chiu remix)

Wake up at 7am after going to bed at 2am because you needed to watch “The Rundown” before returning it to Blockbuster in the morning.

Feed Simon while half awake then climb back into bed.

Wake up at 8am because Simon is clawing the baby gate and needs to use the restroom.

Get ready for work really quickly and forget to take your vitamins - again.

Grab a bottled tea and two Atkins candy bars for breakfast.

While crawling on the freeway to work, realize that the Atkins candy bar only has 140 calories and is not a sufficient meal for a 2500 calorie diet.

Don’t listen to the radio on the drive to work in order to practice focusing on emotions and imagination for acting.

Once you arrive at the parking garage, take your 100k mile ‘93 Ford Taurus to get the rear breaks replaced and wonder how much longer your car will last.

Stay in the office for the weekly catered lunch and have half of a chicken salad, egg salad, and tuna salad gourmet sandwich but don’t eat any of the bread because you’re trying to do the low-carb diet again.

Spend the day working on HTML/JSP code while listening to “Don’t Disturb This Groove” and a bunch of other 80’s and 90’s soft rock tunes 100 times in hopes to stay “emotionally sensitive” and “connected” for acting class.

Lip sync and groove to every song with your headphones on and music turned up - not caring if your co-workers think you’re wierd.

Realize that your co-workers think you’re wierd but don’t care and kinda like it.

Remind yourself that you need to get your proofsheets to your commercial agent and also need to check with your theatrical agent to see if they have made a decision on what photos to use.

Remember that you had a great idea for a unique TV show and do internet research on how to pitch a show to a network.

Receive and read an email from your commercial agent on how to be a good client and worry that you will get dumped from your agency since you have not booked a job in two years and have been on fewer auditions.

Realize that you forgot to call your acting partner about rehearsal and that you have to perform in class tomorrow.

Have the strong desire to go to the gym since it’s been over a week since you’ve last been there, but realize you’re too busy and need to help clean the house with your wife.

Pickup this month’s issue of Men’s Fitness for motivation and inspiration in the gym.

Get too hungry and blow your low-carb diet by eating a Burrito Ultimo w/ sour cream, no rice - from Baja Fresh.

Eventually go to sleep sometime around 2-3am after writing this entry and trying to digitize video for your website.

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