June 2005 Archives

My recent job termination has now been turned into a one week vacation with a nice little bonus since I now have booked another day job. I wish it was that easy to book acting jobs. I didn't receive a callback for that Kodak commercial. No worries though. The short film that I'm in - and also have been editing, is now picture-locked. I met with Roy today to show him the latest edit and he gave it a thumbs up. Now we just have to finish adding some audio effects and the piece will be complete! We will also be starting auditions next weekend for the comedy pilot that Roy wrote. The material is good and could possibly be the vehicle that jump starts all our entertainment careers.

Good news! I've already received two opportunities for full-time employment AND I have a commercial audition for Kodak today. The downside: I'm sick and look like hell. So I've taken some DayQuil and am about to attempt to look presentable for my audition at 1.20 this afternoon. I'm suppose to be an extreme sports guy who likes hiking and spelunking. We'll see what happens but I'm glad I'm at least auditioning again.

BTW, last night H and I watched "Hitch". It could've been a good movie if it was done differently. But I also noticed there were some small roles played by two asian guys that could've been me. I didn't even get the opportunity to audition for the movie. ARGH!

On another note, I finished another edit pass of the short film I'm in "Super Nova". It's looking pretty good! Now I just have to show it to my producer friend and hopefully we can really get moving to finish this project. I then have "ANTHEM" to start editing...

well, at least I'm busy...

I had to visit my old job today to turn in my "release" form and collect my remaining money they were holding for ransom. On the way out I could hear people following me so when I got to the elevator I was curteous enough to hold the elevator door. When I turned around to see who it was, I saw the CEO of the company walking with another person to ANOTHER elevator. I just smiled and released the elevator door. Guess he didn't wanted to be stuck in an elevator with me. I don't know why, it's not like I was gonna flip out or anything.

Today being unemployed didn't feel any different than yesterday when I was employed. I just feel a little rejected. I woke up about the same time I usually do and checked my email for any responses to my 13 resume submissions I made yesterday. Yeah, 13. The tech job market has definitely changed since two years ago when I found myself in this same predicament. Nothing yet. I made some phone calls to people I knew and also contacted some other friends. Everyone seemed to have a lead of some sort. Very cool. So I looked at my resume again, did a couple of revisions and sent it out.

The good thing is, I still have freelance projects I'm working on. I'm also still receiving residual checks from that SBC/Yahoo national commercial I did a few months back. Now that's what I really need. Just a couple national commercials - a few days worth of work a year, and I'd be making a whole lot more than I was being at a job I didn't like. So I spent the time making sure my newest headshots were up on LA Casting and I still need to deliver my new headshots and resumes to both my agencies.

I haven't had an audition in a few weeks. I'm hoping my new photos will help. In the meantime, all my other projects are still on track.

Here's my ToDo list:
-Finish freelance programming work tomorrow.
-Deliver headshots and resumes to agencies
-Continue editing/post production of "Do Something"
-Help shoot "ANTHEM" on Sat
-Do submissions to personal managers
-Figure out CRAB-AID reshoot and pickup shots

Ultimately to break free of needing a day job, I just need to create a breakout project that gains visibility and demonstrates my acting/filmmaking abilities. I just need to create the next "Clerks", or "Open Water" or "Primer" or "Swingers" or "Good Will Hunting".....

But in the meantime, I will need to find a job that I can be happy in. A job that takes advantage of all the skills, creativity and experience I have to offer.

I had a real Jerry Maguire moment this afternoon. I was called into a small conference room by my "CTO/VP of Tech" and told:

"We don't think you are a good fit for this company, therefore we are letting you go."

It's a moment I've experienced many times before. They're all the same. A slight moment of panic, uncertainty, anger and disbelief. In my mind I'm thinking:

"I was suppose to break up with you. Not the other way around."

This has now been the 4th time I've experienced the end of employment as a result of an acquisition or merger. I'm familiar with the drill - last paycheck, documents to sign, the release of the severance check and that final escort off the premises. All standard fare. I handled the whole ordeal with a sense of humor. I actually laughed at the "CTO/VP of Tech" as he basically ignored all my questions of exactly why I was being "let go". He just wanted me gone.

I always knew that punk didn't like me.

I must admit that some of this is my fault. My inability to "act" like I was interested in a dead-end non-creative corporate job. It was just a paycheck to fuel my journey to creative freedom far away from cubicle walls and vending machines in break rooms. The company had very high turn-around rates but I figured that I would stick it out until opportunities in Hollywood would free me from the chains that bound me.

Oh well.

H and I talked a lot this evening about dreams, motivations and reality. She asked me if I thought that being happy and successful in a job would mean I could not be a successful actor. Honestly, a part of me thinks "Yes". But why? I guess because I feel like I need to devote all my thoughts and efforts into the art of acting and film making. I guess I feel like I need to sacrifice current happiness and stability for the possibility of future rewards. I need to suffer for my art.

But is this ridiculous? Is this fair to my wife? How do I balance responsibilities with the pursuit of dreams? H thinks I just need to find a job that I can be happy with - which pays a decent salary, and continue to pursue my aspirations outside of work.

It's all about balance. Finding happiness and fullfillment no matter where you are in life. It's a lesson I'm still learning.

So now I find myself looking for yet ANOTHER job. Now preferably in a more creative place such as a production studio, special effects house, or ad agency.

Or anyone else who will hire a web developer who has a TON of experience.

I need to win the lottery.

On Saturday H and I drove to San Diego to visit her sister who was in town working on an internship. I personally have never been to San Diego so I plotted our route using Google Maps. The two-hour drive wasn't too bad until we started looking for the last exit listed by Google Maps - "Otay Valley Rd". We were driving happily along looking for the exit and were suddenly startled when we noticed the sign "Last USA Exit". To our surprise we had arrived at the Mexico border! I had forgotten how close we lived to Mexico and now I was looking at a mexican flag flying high across the border. We had to turn around and I weaved through traffic trying to find the freeway entrance heading back north. I followed one sign that took us into the border town but there was no entrance to the freeway. We looped around and I tried a different route to no luck. I finally ended up stopping at a gas station to get directions (yes I admit when I'm lost). We eventually made it back to the freeway and headed north. H called her sister and was able to find out the exit we should've taken - which by the way was not Otay Valley Rd but Auto Valley Parkway.

That afternoon we ended up visiting the San Diego Zoo and later went to the beautiful island town of Coronado for dinner and drinks. San Diego is absolutely beautiful. Much more than LA. In fact H and I discussed the possibility of moving to Coronado or at least closer to San Diego. Later research proved that I would have to have a pretty successful acting career to move to Coronado since the prices of houses we found started at $16mil.

Ok, well maybe not but it was a little scary and surreal to hear the emergency broadcast on TV warning about a possible tsunami on the coast of California. Santa Monica, Venice Beach, Malibu - gone. The waves would expand and consume everything to the hills of Hollywood and La La Land would be no more.

But the porn industry would survive. They were smart to be in the valley.

My brother has been visiting for the past week so I haven't had a chance to update my blog. What's cool though, is that he willingly acted as my PA, grip, AD, and script supervisor on the short film I shot on Saturday. "Crab-Aid" is the first ever short film that I've written and directed. It's also the first short film I've ever attempted to shoot using pro-sumer gear such as my Sony PDX-10 with Tiffen filters and my new Britek 500w lighting kit. My brother Chris and I stayed up till 5am creating and preparing props for the movie and creating a shot list. The next day we showed up at my friend Jeff's apartment at 9am to begin production. I had Chris setup the lights while I prepared the set and setup the shots. Then I attempted to light the scene for shooting. The results are pretty good! I was impressed with some of the shots that I was able to get but some of the shots are not properly lit because we had problems with the lights. For some reason the halogen light bulbs wouldn't "snap" into the place and would turn off at the slightest bump. It also didn't help that the lights get extremely hot and cannot be touched for at least 15min after they are switched off. But for the most part the experience was great and I can't wait to finish editing the piece!

In the meantime I'm suppose to be finishing editing the other short film I'm in and uploading all my new headshots to the online casting systems and printing out new 8x10's for both my agencies.

Sometimes there doesn't seem enough hours in the day.

BTW I need to get back to the gym. If I could just get in top physical shape I know I could model more and get more opportunities as a leading male actor...

I was never into breakdancing. I was more of the MC Hammer/Janet Jackson dancer back in the day. But ever since I saw the brazilian martial art Capoeira, I wished I could go back in time and learn how to dance like that! Even if you've seen good breakdancers tearing it up on the street or the dance floor, you've probably never seen anything like this:

http://media.ebaumsworld.com/breakdance.wmv.
This video will make you say "DAMN!"

Then here's another video: http://www.redbull.ch/mime/1085664893872-697757735/bcone_kl.mpg

And here's some capoeira videos to show how breakdancing got started:
http://www.capoeiraarizona.com/movies/MovieGallery.htm

The other day Jeff and I shot a rough/rehersal version of CRAB-AID (a short film/commercial spoof I wrote). I spent last night and this morning throwing together a rough-cut to get a feel how the film would look and I am pleased with the results. It's funny and I can't wait to shoot the real thing.

Roy stopped over the other night as well to take a look at my second edit for the "Do Something" piece that he wrote and directed (and I acted). He was happy with the direction it was going and gave me a bunch of notes on how to tigthen it up and make it better. We're getting close to finishing the editing process and next we'll be tackling music and sound. I will be handling these tasks as well so it will be fun to see the whole piece come together. It's been a great learning experience for me. By the time we will have finished this piece I will have learned how to edit a film in Adobe Premiere Pro and add sound effects and music to complete the piece!

I also recently met with Roy and two other people from a local comedy troop to discuss putting together a pilot. Roy has written a great script which has a very Monty Python-esque feel to it. It's fast, smart and funny and we're all confident that we will be able to get noticed with this show!

Tomorrow afternoon, during our lunch breaks, my friend Jeff and I will start filming our very first comedic piece which I wrote entitled "CRAB-AID". This will be our first venture together in making a short film and it will be my first production as writer/producer/actor/filmmaker. Tomorrow will kinda be a test since we only have one hour to film anything and I will be setting lights up for the very first time...

Actually, as I was writing the last sentence I had to stop and think. Do I really have the time to setup and light a scene for filming? Even if it's just filming Jeff in a short scene on the phone?

... I just timed myself setting up the light and softbox from the point of opening the bag to switching on the light. 6 minutes. So that's 12min just to assemble the lights not accounting the actual time it will take to setup the lights to film the actual scene. Then there's a fact I forgot: the lights get HOT!!! I just had the light on for about 5min and the casing is already hot to the touch. I can't strike the lights while they're hot so that would be another 10-15min of just waiting for the lights to cool down before I can strike them from set...

So I guess what that means is that we'll just have to schedule a day on the weekend (or two) so that I can take the time to do things right. I don't have all the props ready anyway so that will be good to have some time.

Tomorrow what I think I'll do is instead do a rehersal/screen test and actually shoot the piece but without using any lights or anything. I can then edit a rough version of the film to get a feeling of what I'm going for. Doing it this way I should be able to shoot the entire short film in an hour. Now that's guerilla filmmaking.

That leads me to an idea I've been playing with in my head - to shoot an entire full-length feature in one day. Could it be done? What would it look like? I don't know but I'm curious to try.